He was cute but I let my insecurity take over after hearing his thoughts.
His words moved me. It made me think of myself in some sense.
As I walked into the bus station, I noticed a tall light-skinned guy, siting in the back where I usually sit. I thought he was cute. I didn't know how to go about it though. "What if he has a girlfriend?," I thought about. I overheard it. I know it was wrong but I had to see if he was smarter than the average guy. (Indeed, he was). How he spoke made me smile. The respect he had for his elders drew me to him. He plays basketball. Has a job. Smart in math (which I hate). Has both parents around and even believes in God and listens to gospel music. I overheard him speaking to an elder guy about life situations, family life and sports. I tried to listen in to see if he had a girlfriend. Wasn't much said. He had said he believed in natural beauty. A girl shouldn't have to wear makeup to be beautiful. I value her without it (frankly, how he won me over.) He implied he'd never get married without a prenup and his father told him marriage doesn't change a thing. Same thing my dad would say. He occasionally got up to walk around. He smelled nice! Really nice. I kept thinking, "how will I manage to speak to him? You're 19 years old, GO TALK TO HIM."
I prayed to God that his bus didn't come until mine so I could build up the courage to talk to him. Sitting right next to him, I couldnt. I didn't know what to say. I was at lost for words. Its crazy I just vowed that I wouldn't date anymore but he made me want to reconsider EVERYTHING. 30 is his bus number. The bus he got on. I debated about getting on the bus just to get his number, maybe even his name. Shoot, the school he goes to! Now I'll never know. I'll never what couldve been and I'll be thinking on "what if." I can't believe I allowed him to slip away. I think he could have been perfect for me.
What's the perfect guy if it's not the perfect time?